There is an amusing story about St. Theresa of Avila. One day while traveling with some of the sisters of her convent they came upon a carriage stuck in the mud. Theresa and her other sisters worked to push the carriage from the mud with little success as it was mired so deeply in the mud. St. Theresa tries encouraging her sisters by saying, “ This is how God rewards His Friends,” meaning giving opportunities to help. However one sister replies: “ Maybe that’s why He has such few friends! “ The cost of following Jesus may be more than we think is reasonable at times.

Two of his disciples, James and John, as we heard in today’s reading from Mark, think they see the direction that things are going with Jesus. He is able to do miraculous deeds, he silences the religious critics, people flock to him - he is one with great power and a growing following. They want to position themselves to be close to him when all is said and done. Like so many of us, they are attracted to those who have power and influence, hoping, as Barbara Brown Taylor says in writing about this incidence, that it will rub off on them and they will have it too.

The attractions of power are many and seductive, and they draw us into an illusion which usually leaves us empty and disillusioned. As Verna Dozier so aptly says are we pursuing our dream or God’s dream for us - one evaporates and one gives us life. Jesus uses the temptation which has a hold on James and John to open for them and for us to overhear this conversation, another way. He teaches them that God is not concerned with who is best or first, but with who knows how to serve without seeking the acclaim, which is a hard lesson for all of us. ( We don’t live in a world that values self-giving without recognition.) Jesus bid his disciples to find their identity in the ways in which they were part of God’s activity and to understand that they had to keep their eyes on how He, Jesus, responded to God’s will. To do this they, as we, need to grasp the magnitude and power of God’s love for us in all our imperfections, if we would be able to resist the temptations to specialness which only serve to cloud the eyes of our spirit. In other words to be a disciple we have to be willing to face our self-deceptions which keep us from seeing ourselves and our motives honestly. Paula Ripple in her book Growing Strong in Broken Places, says it this way (page 179):

“Jesus told his followers in ways sometimes too straight forward to hear, that if they wanted to remain his friends, they would have to walk the way he walked. They would have to eat his flesh and make his values their own, if they wanted to bear the name Christian as his memorial...”

Throughout his life, Jesus said and did things which involved misunderstanding, criticism and even hostility in his relationships with others. Because he took for granted that pain was part of life and suffering was a companion in the battle with a world which was and is often not in sync with God. It is not surprising that in those final moments of sharing, he would repeat this reminder to his friends; “ When you remember me, remember also that this bread has been broken and this wine poured out. When we hear these words we are to understand that all lives that have ever been or ever will be broken in the act of sharing God, in caring for his children, in fighting for the dignity of persons, in caring for this earth - all such lives were, are and will be blessed and offered in the name of Jesus Christ, God’s first gift.

This is the image of God’s redeemers which the words of the prophet Isaiah describe and which have historically been understood to describe Christ. They also describe all of us who follow him - when we are able to see power in serving and forgiving, in representing the love of God in being with rather than over our neighbor, our friend, our co-worker, our family members. To quote a wonderful passage from Barbara Brown Taylor in her book The Bread of Angels, “ The new world ( in Christ ) is not remotely like the old one. It turns the old one upside down. The number ones are not he powerful ones having their pictures taken at the head of the table; they are the quiet ones slipping in and out among the guests, refilling wine glasses and laying down clean silverware for the next course. The great ones are not the dignitaries to the left and right of the ruler; they are the slaves who are stirring the pots in the kitchen, testing the temperature of the soup so that it is neither too hot or too cold for the guest.” Jesus reminds us that our role is to make sure there is enough food on the table, enough places for those who need to eat, that the door is open and we are inviting those in who need a place where they can receive food enough. “ This much is for sure: whether we can make sense of it or not, serving is how we will transform the world, not from the top down, but from the bottom up. The ultimate trickle-up-effect.... If we are able to understand this any better than the disciples it is only because Jesus is still serving us, still feeding us, still giving himself away for us....so maybe the best we can do is to grab hold of the mystery any way we can and hang on for dear life.”

In the words we heard from Hebrews, “ Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and grace to help in time of need. “ In this knowledge we will be able to go forth in the spirit of Christ, to love and serve the Lord, for is loving and continuing to give himself for us and through us. When you receive the bread this morning pause for a minute and hold it before you eat, letting the awareness that God’s love and grace are more than we could ever deserve, then receive and be thankful.

Amen.